butte 8B

elleogoI just returned from a mid-day Starbucks trip. It’s officially summer, and therefore officially Liquid Diet season. For some reason, it gets hot and I practically subsist on Slurpees, Frappuccinos, and Corona alone. And ibuprofen.

Remember the days when Starbucks weren’t on every conrer? When it was a treat to find one? When the employees were hipster/slacker 20-something art students who dressed in all black and were into beat poetry?

Now even Starbucks has succumbed to the youth movement. I was subjected to listen to 2 overly cheerful pony-tailed 16 year olds talk about Shaggy. And, they got my order wrong.

I need more Brooding Meaningful Conversations! I miss those hipsters. The same hipsters that started the Starbucks trend. The same ones who are now old enough that they own SUV’s and go to Starbucks for their weekly Mommy and Me playgroups. And eat their young.

Other Stuff:

Do you find me SexxY Crazy Cool?

– I keep a list of people I’d like inivited to my funeral/wedding on my computer Desktop. It gets modified daily. If I get mad at you for some reason, you are taken off the List temporarily. It is actually named List_1.doc. There is no List_2. Yet. Bwo ha ha.

– Is Carson Daly Tyne Daly’s son?

– I spent over 25 minutes yesterday trying to figure out a way to SEE if someone was online on AOL IM without actually having AOL IM installed on my own computer. Then I decided probably you couldn’t figure that out.

– I call businesses at midnight to see what their answering services sound like. This is how one night 2 years ago I called New Crime Productions in Venice Beach, Ca and a man answered. A man with a particularly strange and familiar and comforting voice. Now I’m not one to jump to conclusions, but I AM one to jump to conclusions. So I squeaked and hung up the phone quickly.

– Yes, I really once waitressed in a retirement home. Most of my comic and skewed looks on life come from those 6 months of existence. The term “Station Five” still sends shudders down my spine. Shudder.

– Quick! List five things that make you really happy.

– The roommate situation is getting weirder and weirder.

– Vile hatred of gadzooks clothing. Vinyl sends evil messages to my brain. Murderous rage. Must kill.

– Won’t get out of my head: The episode was when the Simpsons house-sat for Mr. Burns, and they were all eating sloppy joes at the very long dining room table. Homer at one end says: LOOK..HOW. LOUD. I. HAVE. TO. YELL.,” in a really slow voice. For some reason, that statement has been popping into my head nonstop for weeks. Every time I think of it, I burst into these half-snort maniacal giggles. It is inconvenient during staff meetings.

– You know, Sig Other doesn’t even know I write here? Neither does my family. Shhhhh. It’s our little secret, my double web life.

– K, my old druggie friend from high school, is back in town from her escapades in CA and she’s working at Borders. I cannot wait to see that crackahead.

You complete me,

elle

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