politiks and jew

Someone was bound to bring it up.

Now, I’ll only harp on his once. I don’t have anything else of any real interest to say, and I was just reading the paper. So thus is my topic for today. Deal with it. But if you want to read all about it, go to salon.com or any major newspaper, and I’m sure it will be the major headline. Obviously, besides Bush’s own idiotic actions (energy, anyone?) not much else is newsworthy this week. Hell, even Sig Other is on vacation, and he’s “The Media!”

But, Jenna, darling… could you BE any more stupid?

People say the media should stay out of this. It’s not news. It’s a family affair. I have to argue. It IS news… just not very good news. No fear, something bigger and better will come along… wars, gas prices, plane crashes, etc. It’s bound to happen and this will fade away. But a part of me really wants this girl in the limelight for a little while longer. Simply because it was her own damn fault. You never saw Chelsie acting like an idiot. Although she probably isn’t much fun to begin with.

Jenna Bush reminds me of a lot of girls I knew in college, some of whom were my roommates. They never really learned the art of stealthiness, and they were always afraid they’d miss something. God forbid the party go on without them. Jesus. Make it a Blockbuster night occasionally. People like this make me tired.

But really, three times? Jenna. You made it to college (granted, that doesn’t mean much- some of the smartest people I know have no degrees to their names, some of the stupidest people I know made it through four or five years at my alma mater. And one even made it to the position of the United States President. Who knew?) If you want to drink, underage, fine. Whatever. But you should only be allowed to if you are smart enough to get away with it, and obviously, Jenna Bush FAILED THE TEST.

The worst part about it is that she doesn’t even get a good story out of it. Jenna! You are so boring! She got a fake ID taken by a bartender when she was carded? Oh, give me a break. Every damn kid in America has that happen to them. Jenna! You are a unique figure in the public eye! Therefore, we demand unique stories! This one SUCKED! Next time, PLEASE remember to have your alcohol-related crimes involve nudity, Vaseline, and length of rope, some leather, a transvestite named Luscious, Mace, pissing yourself, and finally assaulting a police officer with a butter knife. That may hold my attention.

There is very little chance of anyone making a serious dent in underage drinking in this country anytime soon. I still wonder why this country lets their 18 year olds vote but not consume alcohol. At the same time, why risk it? Wait another year or two and you can go boozing all you want. (I love a good party and a good beer, but by shortly after my 21st, I was burned out. The thrill was gone and I would have rather been curled up in bed with a good book some weekend nights.) Sneaky lawmakers! They knew!

Alcohol is seen as a vice (blame on our Puritan roots, blame it on the staunch Baptists, blame it on the Mormons, blame it on whoever.) Instead of raising our children to have a glass of wine with dinner, some parents teach their children that alcohol is evil and inherently bad, and for touching it you are on the road to hell. Others teach their children to rage on. The party never stopped at some parents houses when I was in high school- you know these people, every town has them. “My kids are going to party anyway, might as well be in my own house.” That theory is decent enough, but the parents usually using employing this theory have the IQs of turnips. If intelligent parents used this theory more often, maybe we’d be okay. But not these people. They are trying their damndest to be cool and vicariously live out their lives through their offspring. It’s so pathetic. It’s not the drink that’s bad, it’s the fools around it.

As a country, we are too big geographically and too careless to have an effective public transportation system (sure, the Metro is grand and all, but it closes early and I still have a 10 to 15 minute drive to the suburbs to get to a station. Not everyone lives in New York City, man. Last Friday night, there was a 17 year old somewhere in Topeka wondering why he couldn’t just catch a bus home so he could go to sleep.) If we had one, I assure you, drunk driving would be another matter.

Why aren’t we more like Europe? Why don’t we send on the bus to the supermarket for a bottle of wine? (Eh, so you have to overlook the Ecstasy and Opium and clubbing thing and the badly gelled hair and womanizing attitude and unshaved pits and the fact that your sons don’t move out of the house until age 35, at which time you’re still cleaning their rooms and doing their laundry, but it’s a small price to pay to have kids that aren’t drunks.) Ha, Europe.

I’m sure Daddy Georgie made a fine partier. One more reason I don’t want him in charge of my country. I need a DORK! A President Dork who will crochet with me. And buy me raspberry mocha frappucinos.

PS. I am listening to Can. And Jimmy Eat World. They will be on the warped Tour. JEW, not can. Can is Kraut.

4 Responses to “politiks and jew”


  • blame it on the rain, yeah, yeah…

    yes and can rocks…

    fuck the police

    i am still saying we should pool our resouces and move to mars

    i’ll make dinner,
    mat

  • so down with marz. fuck earth. earth is for suckers. just like the us!

    ready to pool anytime you give the command.

    elle

  • Assault with a butterknife. If only I knew someone that did stuff half as entertaining as that…oh wait I do.

    wahoo JMU

  • i love butterknife assaults.

    they are endlessly entertaining.

    e.

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