rico suave, on and on

will eduardo fall for the temptation of vanessa? or will he just eat bunny pancakes?  temptation island II starts soon, tune in, i know i will.Sometimes I borrow my good ideas, sometimes I actually come up with this on my own. I am a clever missy.

Elle’s Fun List of Her Favorite Supporting Character’s in Lovable Sitcom’s

1. “The Vulture:” Alter Ego of Uncle Jesse, Full House. No, I do not mean Uncle Jesse, I mean the episode when he turns into The Vulture for his new hard rock band. I don’t think this was Jesse and the Rippers but I could be mistaken. Anyways, crazy funtime antics ensue when The Vulture is to be let down on wires into the crowd during one of his shows, and he gets hilariously stuck! Oh! Other fun scenes of Full House in general are when Michelle talks back and gets uppity, or when someone hugs. In college Full House came on right as I was getting home from classes, but when my roommates were all gone, and so I would play Full House drinking games by myself. (Question: does anyone remember when the Joey character went from being “Joey Cochran” to “Joey Katsopolis?” Dude, they turned him Greek LATER!) Alos, there was Aaron. But if you read www.whatever-dude.com, you’ve already covered this terrortory.

2. Richard “Boner” Stabone, Growing Pains. What a handful that boner was! (Ha ha! Say that out loud!) He added a lot of authentic Italianness to the Seavers. He really was part of their “growing pains!”

3. Dwayne Schneider, One Day at a Time. Dwayne looked like a porn star. Okay, not really a star, Dwayne looked like the lead role of a bad porn made in a basement with someone’s home Beta camcorder. But he was solid, and he seriously was the Wilt Chamberlain of fix-it-ery. Oh, Schneider.

4. Becky Conner, Roseanne. Okay. They didn’t even TRY on this one. You couldn’t have just said Becky went to college or moved into her own trailer or ran away or something, and THEN brought in a blonde cousin? Or babysitter? The casting and producer people were just like, fuck it. Sweet Jesus. I love it!

5. Les Nessman, WKRP in Cincinatti. Poor Les was a big dork that never got any action. He did not have the stunning good looks of Andy Travis, who I had a superior crush on. BUT, he does share my initials. I love you, Les, even when others don’t.

6. Charlene, Designing Women. There’s a story about why I love Jean Smart. One, the woman who wrote Designing Women also went to high school with my dad. So in this series (and in Evening Shade) the writer uses names from my dad’s home town. The character of Charlene is actually from this town in the TV series. In one scene, Charlene is wearing a “Mules” teeshirt, the mascot of my dad’s high school. It’s all very creepy, but they show reruns on Lifetime, and Charlene reminds me of my aunts. Incidentally, I have had recurring fantasies about bootkicking Mesach Taylor until he is a bloody pulp, so it makes for good entertainment when I scream maniacally at the TV when he walks into the “Sugarbaker Design Shop.” Also, that bastard is on “To Tell the Truth,” which makes me have convulsions.

7. Jesse McKenna, Life Goes On. The obvious choice here would have been Corky, but you give me no credit. First off, he’s Chad Lowe in real life! Second off, he had AIDS! Awww, that’s sad! Third off (?), he felt masculine enough to marry Hilary Swank, winner of the Biggest Teeth Award this side of the Julia Roberts!

8. Frank Lemmer, Parker Lewis Can’t Lose. I have a special place in my heart for people trying to git Corin Nemec. I think Corin is a Scientologist now. Anyway, if Frank Lemmer had been real, and had gone to my high school, he probably would have been in Drama.

9. David Puddy, Seinfeld. I really did love Seinfeld, and I’m glad it quit when it did. One more year and I would have wanted to slit my own throat. The comic genius that is Puddy practically brings me to tears. Patrick Warburton was also good in the short-lived “Dave’s World” series, but nothing compared to his run as Elaine’s boyfriend. You see, Elaine and I have a lot in common, mostly the dancing skills. And to this day, aytime someone asks for affirmation in my family, they can count on the response of “yeah, that’s right,” a la Puddy. Also, I occasionally program the extra radio station buttons in my car to Christian music for the humor value.

And last but not ever, ever least:

10. The Asian Guy from 21 Jump Street. His character name was Vin Van Tran, but that has really nothing to do with it. What really makes him a sentimental favorite is that the actor’s real name is… (are you ready for this?) DUSTIN NGUYEN. I LOVE the fact that this wonderful Asian actor’s name is DUSTIN ! It’s like meeting my cousin’s friend Joe Yu, who is Chinese and has an Arkansas accent!

There are really, literally, a bunch more I could list, for example, Cree Summer’s character in “A Different World.” But I won’t go there. And Johnny Depp, but that kind of falls in the same “Stamos-esque” category, and besides, he’s kind of a lead.. But I won’t go there either. As you can see, in my heart and always, The Vulture takes the cake. These aren’t really in any order, but John… oh Jesse…oh Vulture… you’re sweet flowing tresses and pouty come-hither lip curl get me every time. And, I have a thing for rockers.

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