Cash A Wave Of The American Inefficiency

From the Washington Post Express this morning:

Page 12 – Cash A Wave: Citizens Bank is offering touch bank cards that customers can simple wave their [card] in front of readers, rather than physically inserting them. The bank said the new touch-and-go cards will save users time and effort.

I don’t want to be a hater, but I have two serious issues with this. Ok, maybe I do want to be a hater.

  • When did people who bank become so fucking lazy that waving their hand in front of a reader takes way too much time out of their day. Not to mention effort. And waving their hand down a reader will save them so much time. The inefficient laziness amazes me. Not to mention that they are going to save 0.043 seconds for each “slide” – Ok. So if the average person then “slides” 7 times a week. They’ll then have saved approximately 15.652 seconds a year. Wow. That’s almost enough time to write a quick email. Or pee. Think of the emails you can write! Think of the time you could instead spend on the shitter. OH THE TIME! I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO WITH MYSELF!! HELP ME GOD! I AM A GOD WARRIOR!!
  • You’d think the money they spent on this would be better spent on having customer service representatives either trained more to be helpful (no shit!) and/or to hire more staff to actually answer the phone rather than pressing buttons and talking to a machine. Customer service in this country is atrocious. Dogs know it.

So I just don’t get it. I simply don’t get it. Help me lord, almighty.

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