“When you were little, did you use the word “cock” a lot? In the town I grew up in, we all said it. For example, “Dude, your bike is SO cock! It meant like, cool, neato, thumbs up.” –Jeff Tweedy

Weekend in review:

Friday night was the Great Guinness Toast, for those of you living under a rock. This is where lots of people who are not Irish get together all around the world and toast at a synchronized time to set a world record. I am not Irish. Not even a .00009%. At least, not that I know of. Even though my middle name is Erin, it means nothing. Trust me. I know lots of girls named things like Rachel, and they are not Jewish. So, point being, The Friends (and the rest of the godforsaken planet) and I went to Murphy’s in Alexandria for this event. Apparently, the Great Guinness Toast was not well synchronized, because after toasting upstairs I went to the bathroom downstairs and that floor was toasting five minutes later. All hail me O-M, you are reading a world-record holder. Twice over even maybe! I think the highlight of the night was having a Guinness spilled down my pants. Jeans turn a disgusting shade of olive-green when someone dumps dark beer on them.

I don’t even drink Guinness.

Saturday, I went to the National Zoo. The zoo makes me sad for some of the animals. Like the hippos. They are so big and their pool is so small. Poor hippos. But I did get to see the new baby giraffe there (born on January 18th, her name is Jana) and anyone who knows me knows I think giraffes are cock. This giraffe was awesome. Giraffes are so neat because they have beautiful long eyelashes. I also saw the new pandas everyone has been making such a big deal over, and while they were cool, they were no giraffes.

How do the prairie dogs not escape? There are no fences at the Prairie Dog pit! I bet you could take one home with you.

Then came Tweedy. I’ve decided if someone ever decides to marry me, how cool would it be to have “Hesitating Beauty” playing? That Woody Guthrie and his loopy love songs. But there was a screeching girl behind me at the show, and nothing peeves me more than screeching girls. From now on, she will be referred to only as The Harpie.

Sunday was so uneventful I can’t even bother to type, but The Father and I did watch “Jackass.” And, my mom made pie.

Boring post? Yes, indeedy!

1 Response to “greatest”

  • Apparently someone from that 9:30 Club crowd was at the TLA show too, because he got Jeff saying “cock” too. After the first encore, he left us with “Thanks, you guys are cock!”

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