Tag Archive for 'Mulligan'

This Undeniable Force They Call The Pussy

There is nothing more than I hate when people whine. Ok, maybe people sighing. It’s ok if I whine, but when other people, or rather, when cats do it, it slowly eats away at my soul.

The irony is that I married the love of my life who happens to have 2 cats. Lucky me. And because Em is pregnant, I have taken over a lot of the pussy duties. I clean the litter and feed the cats now. I kinda had been doing this for a while, but it’s official now. This has equated to them sadly thinking I am their new care giver. Again, lucky me.

Now the problem comes in when they *think* they are hungry. Which seems to be every 32 seconds. If you are even in a 10 foot radius of the container that holds their food you get a “MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROAR!!!” If you start walking down the stairs to get water or to turn on the heat. Either staircase, too. You’ll get a “MEEEEEEEEEEEOWWWWWW(ROAR!)” from Lulu- With an emphasis on the “ow.” And as of late when you get up from the couch in the living room, Mulligan assumes it’s time for her feeding and I am headed to the “feeding place” simply to feed her alleged empty stomach.

I’ve tried training them, but they can’t learn. Since the whining gets on my nerves so severely, I started squirting them with water when they start whining when I am in the “dead zone.” I gave that 7 days and it didn’t curb their appetite for whining. I added a table spoon or 6 of apple cider vinegar. It’s been about 14 days of that with no sign of let up. I think I’ve come to the conclusion that I expect too much from pussies. I’ve sort of given up on the vinegar solution because in the end I have to touch Mulligan after I feed her because of her insulin shots and nothing is worse than vinegar hand.

Now I am writing this, declaring my frustrations with these animals. But at the same time I am trying to understand these foreign creatures. I’ve seriously tired to learn the way of the pussy. But I’ve come to the conclusion I will never understand these beings. And quite honestly, I don’t care.

But to prove to you their horrific yet soaring whining abilities, I recorded their whining today, just about 4 hours after they were fed this morning. Clearly they needed a feeding. (Lulu is mainly in the left channel and Mulligan in the right)

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And what’s cool is in reverse it sounds like a helpless crying baby. Coincidence?

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Pussy Power

Sometimes those pussies really can be cute. Usually this happens when they are not awake nor close to me. There you go.

The Pussy Cat 5

Last night from the toilet (#1, mind you) Emily asked me to open one of the doors upstairs as she thought one of the pussies was locked in there. We are closing all the doors upstairs with all the construction to minimize dust distribution. But what is bizarre is how I have filtered out those frequencies when the cats cry so I heard nothing. Yay me.

So I opened the first door. I poked my head in and put my hand to mouth to carry my voice further and said, “HELLO MULLIGAN AND LULU!” Nothing. I crossed the hall, mind you it’s about 8 feel long and opened the guest room door. “HELLO MULLI….” – Just then a sly little pussy, whose name is Mulligan rubs up against my leg. Hmmm. Sneaky bastige.

Emily was laughing from the toilet. I guess she was right about laughing at me. I was yelling and looking for them as if they were 6 feet tall and deaf. Not to mention, human.

I still don’t understand pussy cats.

And on a pussy-side-note (PSN for those in government – pronounced piss-in’) I have started a new game with ours. Our food bowls are on the landing down to the basement. So when I fill their bowl with food they poke their head through the cat door and try and get themselves between my scooper that is pouring food and the bowl. Yes, literally. Thus sometimes allowing themselves to be showered with cat food. They don’t seem to mind, but it makes a huge mess and frustrates me to no end. So I have resorted to keeping a water gun nearby. I am telling you the water gun is my savior. Bring it on, pussy cats. I’ll baptise your ass!