Irving, It’s Sad. So Sad.

Normally, I am pretty Christmas tolerant. My tolerance is generally pretty high on the Santa-coefficient. I mean I am a non-Christian living in a Christian nation and the thought of people dressed like elves, Christmas music on the radio airwaves 24/7, people putting up red socks on their mantles which cheap plastic things inside, and the sort, is pretty darn funny for a so-called religious holiday.

I do still want to know why Santa is even part of the Christmas experience. Not one Christian I have met knows the reason why he’s involved.

But when Target, a company I normally support, starts wishing people a Merry Christmas on their commercials prior to Thanksgiving it makes me want to shoot Kris Kringle in the face. Bloody fucking murder mother fucker.

Yes, I am bitter and no it’s not because it’s not a part of my heritage. I am bitter because it’s absolutely insane and lavishly overblown. And when you need so-called rules to delegate tact for selling spinning shit, there is something wrong. Then I remind myself I live in America and I sigh. Yes, I sigh.

It all comes down to the fact that Santa never had good kasha varnishkes. Things would be different and people would know who the fuck Santa really is.

However, I do think it’s the greatest thing (besides Kris Kringle and his cute little elves) that we don’t have free cable in our new house here in Butcher’s Hill. We are limited to 5 channels, which mean we’ll watch less TV. At least I hope. I did ask Santa to destroy our TV. Does he do that shit? Or does he only do good?

Did I tell you we live in the greatest rowhouse in America? More on that later.

8 Responses to “Irving, It’s Sad. So Sad.”


  • It really is the best rowhouse in the world. I promise.

  • “I do still want to know why Santa is even part of the Christmas experience. Not one Christian I have met knows the reason why heÒ€ℒs involved.”

    There actually apparently used to be a man, I believe in Germany or possibly in one of the Scandinavian countries, who would go around during Christmas with a bag of gifts for people. I believe his name was Nicholous. I’m not sure if he was actually sainted (and thus St Nick) or not. Or even if this is remotely true.

  • And of course I get the story from man who is Jewish πŸ˜‰ (half, that is)

    Thanks Eric!

  • I’m fully Jewish, biotch! Did you ever hear about my ass gettin baptized?! πŸ˜‰

    And yeah, I wouldn’t mind the holidays so much if it weren’t for the oppressive imposition of all that horrible fucking music blaring all over American for the month prior to Christmas. But at least I like my family and Erika’s family and we all get shitface drunk together at our holiday parties!

  • I never realized you fully identified with being 100% Jewish. Good to know!

    Sad that a lot of the Christmas music was written by Jewish writers.

  • Hey, Hitler didn’t parse Jewishness, so why should I? πŸ˜‰

    We celebrate Christian holidays with my father, but my sister and I were specifically raised Jewish.

  • Did I ever mention that during Christmas, I call my husband “Kris” Kringle? LOL. When I was a child, I loved the idea of St. Nick, but when I got older, I didn’t like the idea of a focus on consumerism during a Christian holiday (even though I believe Jesus was born in the summer at night). Anyhow, the fact remains is that Christmas is just another pagan holiday celebrated in many shapes and forms.

    I’m a Christian, but then again, you already knew that. I can say that when I celebrate Christmas now, it’s all about Jesus. I even decorate my pagan Christmas tree with decorations of angels, sheep, etc. Anything that reminds me of who I view as God.

    It’s true what you say though, and I just want to add that I think it’s very tacky to be celebrating Christmas this early and forcing it onto others. Now with that being said: HAPPY HOLIDAYS to you and yours! LOL. ((tee-hee))

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